I have had to write too many condolences to friends and family that have lost a close relative (usually a parent). I've found these letters or emails to be incredibly awkward and I have often been stymied by what to say. After all, what can you say that will make a difference? I came across this list from Grief.com. Following this guideline has been incredibly helpful with writing thoughtful condolence letters. I usually end up by saying something like: "Instead of saying